Search Results

Managing Database Systems For A Successful Business

Body Language in Business – How to Find the Most Important Person in the Room

Networking events. Association meetings. Conferences. Regional meetings. Trade shows. Each of these events represents an opportunity. Making the sale. Making the right connection. Exchanging business cards with the right person.

But how do you know who Mr. or Ms. Right is? Who is the person who can green light your product or service within their company?

One option is the internet. Do your research, find the bigwig’s name, do a Google Image search, and you have your target. At the event, you can scan the room until you see the person and introduce yourself.

But what if that’s not possible? What if they don’t show up? What if Google Image search pulls up nothing? What if you’re not sure who your ideal target is?

Thankfully, when this happens, you don’t have to randomly approach people and hope they are your mark. You can be a detective at all your future business meetings and use the skills of deciphering body language to discover the most important people in any group.

After speaking at an event, I went to the hotel’s lounge to relax and unwind. Wanting to enjoy some alone time, I sat in the far corner booth and began one of my favorite activities: people watching.

There was another conference at the hotel and some of their attendees came to the lounge for a social hour. At first everyone was shaking hands, welcoming one another and being very friendly. After awhile the large group started splitting up into subgroups. 5 women chatting at one table. 3 men laughing at another. 2 women standing and gossiping. But, there was one subgroup that caught my attention.

I noticed 3 gentlemen. One tall, good posture, well dressed. The second was of average height, well dressed, good posture. The third was short, had poor posture, and was – quite frankly – poorly dressed. Who is the most important person of the group?

Most people would say one of the first two gentlemen. They had strong posture, knew how to carry themselves, and their clothing reeked of success. Most people would be wrong.

After knowing a few body language basics, you would know to look more closely. While posture and clothing are good variables to observe, they are surface level indicators that can easily and consciously be altered for any situation. As a body language pro, you would want to look at the unconscious indicators to discover your alpha-person of the group.

In this case – as in most – the feet gave it away. Even though the men were standing in a circle, politely facing each other and looking at one another while they spoke, the feet pointed toward Mr. Important himself, gentleman #3. That’s right. Mr. slumped-over-I-don’t-need-to-iron-my-clothes-or-put-together-a-snazzy-outfit-like-the-rest-of-you.

The feet of the other two gentlemen were pointed directly at guy #3 like a pointing dog during the hunt. The feet give away so much information unconsciously. They almost always will point towards the direction where you want to be or towards the person you perceive to be the most important person in the conversation.(Where was Mr. Important’s feet pointing? The door.)

While initial looks might lead you to one conclusion, body language will give you the power to detect the subtleties that lead you to the truth.

Use this body language detective skill for your next meeting. If you want to converse with the “top dog” just follow the feet.

12 Secrets For the Busy Home Schooler

Life is busy. We rush from here to there. We rush through our lesson plans. We rush to finish another project with the kids. We rush to make cookies. We rush to church and special events. We have to pay the bills and buy the groceries and clean the house and make the meals that nobody wants to eat.

And oh yeah, don’t forget you are a full-time teacher. You have to plan the lessons, prepare to teach, and sit down with each child while the others run amok. Then the toddler makes a mess all over the floor while you were doing spelling with your first grader, and everything must be put on hold while you solve the problem.

We give and give until there is nothing left of ourselves, until we are empty. We handle the chores, cook the meals, teach the lessons, drive everyone to their special piano lessons and soccer practice, rush home to make dinner, tuck the kids into bed, and then drag them out of bed in the morning to start it all over again.

Yet we chose to home school because we value a family where community and creativity our nurtured, where there is joy and warmth and rest, where you are not running from one event to the next. Hidden in our hearts, a small spark, a little wish for something deeper, something more eternal, waits to blossom.

We cannot change anyone. We can only change ourselves. To move our families in the right direction, we must first move ourselves in that direction and trust that they will follow. These twelve life principles are lessons I have learned and forgotten and then reapplied to my life many times over.

1. Get up while the house is still quiet. Get your breakfast. Get your shower. Have a moment to drink your coffee and plan your day. You are worth the extra effort to take care of yourself before you start to serve others. If you let them wake you, you will be 10 steps behind the rest of the day. And you will be too tired and grumpy to tackle the day’s challenges.

If the children wake up before you are ready, send them back to bed. As a home schooling family, you can set your own schedule. Let them read in bed for half an hour or play quietly until you are ready.

2. Ignore criticisms and unwelcome advice. Busy bodies everywhere have their opinions about what you should or should not be doing. I’d like to say they mean well, but I’m really not so sure about that. Most of them just want to feel better about their own selves by tearing someone else down, and very few actually know what they are talking about.

3. Keep a journal. Write your thoughts and contemplate yourself. Take the time to recognize your emotional state. Emotions are often warning messages, helping you know when to rest and when something is not healthy. Take the time to ask yourself who you really are. Knowing and finding yourself are integral for good parenting.

4. Explore your own creative aspects. We have arts and crafts for the kids, music lessons for the kids, and writing essays for the kids. If developing the arts is so important for your kids, is it not just as important for you? You want your kids to be well-rounded, right? So don’t be a hypocrite, and you will find your kids being more willing to jump into their lessons, following your example.

5. Never stop learning. Try new things. Check out books from the library to explore a new hobby and study something you’ve always wanted to know. Your brain is a powerful tool. Whatever style of home schooling you may have, you can always unschool yourself.

6. Eat lunch. And have a snack. At the end of the day, I find that I snap more. Why? I don’t feel hungry, but once I’ve eaten dinner my mood improves. We are finite people. Only God is infinite, and we are dependent on water, food, and God to nourish our lives. So don’t be a martyr and eat something.

7. Insist on an afternoon break. Children need downtime in order to have unscheduled, undirected play. No matter how old your children are, it is good for them and you that everyone gets quiet time alone. Send them to their rooms to read or outside to play, but enforce the rule that you are not to be disturbed during this time.

8. Find time to exercise. Just as it is not your wish for your children to be unhealthy, it is not God’s wish for you either. He cherishes you just as you cherish your children. Parental duties and home schooling should never get in the way of this. Keep it fun, and find a routine that fits into your schedule. Maybe fit it in during your morning quiet hour or during the afternoon break. Or get workout videos that the kids can do with you.

9. Take quiet walks frequently. Not for the purpose of exercise. Not for some goal. Just for the chance to meander and to be quiet. To have solitude. To explore. Adults are goal-oriented. Everything we do has a purpose, whether it is to cook dinner, buy groceries, pay the bills, diet, or get some exercise. We are always striving. Sometimes, we just need to put that aside. So trade favors with your spouse, and take a little time each week.

10. Find time to play. Be a kid again. Children are experience-oriented. They do stuff for the simple joy of being. Growing up has made us lose that eternal quality of just being. Sometimes, we just need to enjoy the experience.

11. Never let life become a competition. We compete to be the best mom, to be the best dresser, the best decorator, the best friend, the most organized, the best scrapbooker, the most creative, the most athletic, the most beautiful. But when I stop to contemplate this, I realize that my value really has no bearing on anyone else. Parents celebrate their child’s first steps, however wobbly those steps may be. In the same way, we should celebrate our own wobbly attempts to grow.

12. Learn to say “No.” Sometimes, one more activity, one more responsibility, or one more event is just one too many. Instead, choose to say “Yes” to being home, to spending time with family, or to enjoying a dinner around the table.