Have Busy Hands, Not a Busy Body

I suppose I never really gave gossiping much thought before I became saved. In the world, it’s an acceptable thing to do. Everyone does it so therefore it’s ok. But, much like everything else that goes on in the secular world, once a person is born again, none of what the world does and considers to be normal is acceptable in the eyes of God. When you become in fellowship with Him, you can just feel His eyes as they go to and fro upon the earth to see who is righteous and just before Him. If you truly love Him, you live to please Him and you are transformed into a new being. The old ways just aren’t acceptable anymore, not to God and not to yourself. The Holy Spirit becomes your guide and will let you know when you aren’t pleasing God by the things your are doing or saying. You can’t hide from Him.

I am a fortuneate person because I grew up in a Chrisitian home. Both my parents lived godly lives and they projected this way of life into me. Gossip was never made popular in our home. But as I got older and went out in the world on my own, I didn’t practice all these values in my own life. I just never gave it much thought. I suppose I was made to feel regret later for things I had said, and all that did was destroy trust from others. I often wondered why some people got away with gossip and I never could? The truth is, no one gets away with it forever. God will always reveal this stuff to people so they might come to repentance and confess Christ. He will leave us exposed and looking pretty foolish. I myself got tired of looking like that fool. Because of my human weaknesses I remained in the dark about the right way to be living. I got tired of feeling ashamed for things I had done that I never meant to do. But, you can’t deny the things you get caught in doing and you can’t explain your way out of them. You just hope that you will be forgiven. I finally learned that I first needed forgiveness through Christ so that I could forgive myself for the things I had said and done to hurt others in order to expect them to forgive me.

Now that I’m a different person in Christ I dare not say things about people. Repeating things that are said to me just aren’t tantilizing anymore. I have learned that silence speaks louder than words. It’s a wonderful feeling to know that within me I hold the confidence of someone else. I never feel the guilt or worry that they would ever find out that I repeated something that was not intended to be repeated. Gossip does no more than create problems and negativity to those who come in contact with it. This is not Christ-like living. So why do people who call themselves Christian participate in it? It’s my guess that 1.) Either they aren’t really a Christian or 2.) They don’t know God’s Word very well. Both of which are a real problem.

Some people will justify their Christianity by saying they go to church. As the saying goes; you can sit in a garage forever and that still won’t make you a car! Then on the other hand, if you truly are a Christian who attends church and aren’t living a Christian life then you are in disobedience to the Lord and have no excuse for your behavior. Jesus talks about the dangers of a Christian who knowingly causes someone else to stumble and fall into sin. (Matt. 18:6) God will hold us all accountable one day. To which we can’t offer Him excuses.

The Bible says a lot about the problems that gossiping will cause. I find that people who love talking about others are generally bored. They aren’t keeping busy. This doesn’t mean keeping busy in other people’s affairs. God calls us to serve and serving involves using our hands. If we do serve with our mouths, we should be speaking words of God’s love and truth. This is not gossip, it’s edification. There’s a big difference. Gossip tears people down, God’s Word builds them up.

The apostle Paul wrote to the church in Thessalonica and commended them for their Christian beliefs even during persecution. He wrote mainly on the subject of Christ’s return and how they should be prepared in this event. It still holds true today. We should always strive to be ready for Christ’s return. In first Thessalonians Paul writes about the way Christians should be living.

“Furthermore, Brethren, we beg and admonish you in [virtue of our union with] the Lord Jesus, that you (follow the instructions which) you learned from us about how you ought to walk so as to please and gratify God, as indeed you are doing, [and] that you do so even more and more abundantly [attaining yet greater perfection in living this life].” 1 Thes. 4:1 (Amplified)

Walking as a Christian simply means to submit to Christ and let Him lead you into all righteousness. The only way we can do this to pay attention to what teachers and pastors are telling us. It’s for our own good. It’s not meant to go in one ear and out the other, it’s to be heard and done…every day. Virtue is our goal. Gossiping is not virtuous. Paul knew this and that is why he warns us not to do it.

Here is what Paul says about not gossiping;

“To make it your ambition and definitely endeavor to live quietly and peacefully, to mind your own affairs, and to work with your hands, as we charged you.” 1 Thes. 4:11

It’s not just a suggestion, it’s valuable life sustaining information for Christian living. We must make it our main ambition to live quietly, which is not talking about others. In other words, mind our own business. If no one can point a finger at us, our lives will be that much more peaceful. By keeping our hands busy in doing things that honor God, that will keep us from being busy bodies and poking our noses where they don’t belong. Then we won’t have to worry about who said what about whom. We can stop this fire of the tongue before it ever ignites.

If you find yourself talking about others, ask God to guard your mouth from saying anything that shouldn’t be said. If you hear gossip simply turn and walk away. Don’t play into the whiles of the devil. Stop and consider how you feel when people are talking about you behind your back. Take your concerns to God, only He can solve the problem. Take action in allowing Him to keep you from creating the problem. If we feel the need to talk, let’s talk about God. Only good can come of it.

Only after talking to God about people are we ready to talk to people about God?

4 Acts of Business Body Language

Business body language and business networking run parallels as they both occur at the same time. When you are out at networking events and generating leads or contacts, there is a language being spoken that is nonverbal.

Just as if you were visiting another country and had to communicate with different people who spoke another language, it is important to speak and understand the language of the body. This has the obvious benefits of better communication which can lead to a number of favorable things.

Business body language, just like social body language, has its subtleties and can’t be completely depended upon. However, taking note of certain movements and behaviors can help you in your networking experiences.

We all like to be as prepared as we can for important situations. Knowing what certain positions and movements mean gives us superior understanding and is all part of adequate preparation. Below, are a few body language aspects to take note of and use to your advantage;

Raised Eyebrows

Sometimes people are not as vocal in expressing their inner feelings as you would like them to be. Raised eyebrows is a sign of interest. If you are engaged in a business networking conversation and explaining something, raised eyebrows indicate that your conversation partner has an interest in what you’re saying. Don’t be fooled by the lack of words.

Partially Facing You

Typically, we usually face the direction of our intentions. In other words, when we are engaged in a conversation and are ready to leave in a rush, our bodies will usually start to face towards the door. If this is happening while you are engaged in a conversation, don’t take it personal, the person may have an appointment to get to. To your advantage, make the conversation brief and set up a time to talk later.

Leaning Forward into You

Just as with the raised eyebrows, people have a way of showing interest without talking. When an individual is interested in something, they will lean towards it. We can be very predictable at times and leaning towards an object or person is a clue to take note of. However, pay attention to all of the surrounding factors.

Not Making Eye Contact

You may even see a minor pattern at this point. Typically, when people are interested in something they will face it, or lean towards it.

Not making eye contact can be compared to not being faced. There may be a lack of interest or even a shyness involved. You will have to make your own assertion in this situation. It will be to your advantage to observe this and take the appropriate action to get the results you want.

Breaking Up With Body Image Bashing

I’ve heard it all before..probably said some of it when I was still discovering how kickass I truly am. You know where I’m going with this, right? “I wish my hair was curly”, “I wish my thighs didn’t jiggle”, “I wish I was more tanned”, “I wish I was taller”, “I wish my feet were smaller”, “I wish I didn’t have a mole on my face”, “I wish I was as muscular as him”… blah blah blah.

Well, it’s time to bust up the body image shenanigans and reclaim your self-esteem no matter where you are at in life and no matter what you look like right now. I had a long and secretive affair with body bashing. Now, I no longer allow media, peers, or anything else to influence my feelings of self-worth. I had to break up with body image bashing as it was serving no purpose at all in my life. To be honest, I love my body. I love my lips, eyes, thighs, my hair, and my ears. More importantly, I appreciate all that my body can do. I am grateful for my hearing, my vision, my taste buds, my limbs, my muscles, my feet (which rock sexy pumps), etc. Do you see where I am going with this? I no longer succumb to the societal pressure to not accept myself. I have switched gears and have ended my affair with self-defeating thoughts and feelings. I cannot express in words the utter relief I feel. Explore your mindset – body image is influenced by so many things and by so many people; usually people around us or in our per groups. Guess what? Sometimes we even let stranger’s opinions or comments lower our sense of confidence – not anymore!

I believe you have suffered long enough. How many times have you punished your body for not meeting an unrealistic expectation? Do you walk past the grocery store check-outs and glimpse at the magazines forgetting how fake and phoney the people on the covers appear to be after the many edits and tweaks? The media sends the message that even ‘famous celebrities’ aren’t good enough; they need to be photo shopped and airbrushed.

It is time to break up with self-sabotage. How can you live a healthy life if you’re buying into this type of mind-warping garbage? My self-talk used to rush me to the nearest store, and I’d wallow in a tub of ice cream vowing to never do it again because come Monday I was going on a diet and starting a new exercise regime. Ha!
Proudly, I ended my secret affair with body image bashing and took control of my health; essentially my life. It feels so liberating to love every inch of myself.

How will you bust up your current body image bashing habit and get down to business. Body image affects females and males alike no ifs, ands, or but’s about it! It’s time to stare at yourself in the mirror and appreciate all of the wonderful things your body allows you to do. If you truly cannot bear to do that; seek support. There are a variety of tips and techniques; only you will know what will empower you to move past this traditional, yet annoying habit.

Improving body image is hard work – it takes time, energy, and commitment. Check your self-talk and be mindful of what messages you are telling yourself (on a regular basis). Treat your body with respect – believe me, it will thank you. Monitor your words closely. Does your self-talk change when you’re alone, watching movies, shopping with peers, with your significant other? Evaluate and explore. Recognize that you are not the size of clothing that you wear (hint: all companies create clothing in different sizes to affect your self-esteem in one way or another).

Be cautious, I hear the buzz going around about this fat-burner and that new fad diet, this magic potion and that new wrap, this and that lotion which (rarely) works. We buy into these myths and magical cures for cellulite and fat-reduction because we desperately want to fit in. We desperately want to be accepted. Guess what?? No one will ever accept you until you accept yourself. You are far more than your outer shell. Stop the affair now – your wallet will thank you, too.

Bust up the words you use to describe your body – what are your most fabulous features? What sports or activities are you able to perform because of your fabulous body? You’re either busting up the bashing or you’re carrying on in the vicious and uncomfortable realm of self-destructive behaviour. You are not alone and you do not have to tackle the ending of this affair alone either.

You deserve to accept yourself and love yourself just the way you are. Focus on healthy living and start celebrating your beautiful body today.

There is nothing better than embracing your body (including what you perceive to be flaws).

Confidence and self-acceptance are far more attractive than negativity and rotten insecurities; which end up bringing out the worst in people. Make today the day you break up with body image bashing – your entire life will change.